Rosie snorts Cocaine

It's true!! I've really become a fan of the view since Rosie started 'moderating' - although she's so funny

that I have a hard time reconciling her in any position that could be described as 'moderate'. So anyway, yesterday Rosie brought on these cans of Cocaine - a new energy drink - to discuss whether or not she was the only one who thought that the name was inappropriate. Joy made the point that the name is no worse than Coke. Barbara said that Rosie just gave them more advertising than they could have ever paid for - for free. Rosie takes a sip of it (something about the taste of pink drinks - I'm sold! I love cream soda) then brings it up to her nose and sniffs it - to make like she's snorting cocaine. The problem freakin' hilarious bit was - it being a carbonated beverage and all - she sniffed up little cocaine bubbles!!! Her eyes started watering and she couldn't pull it together. At first I think that the other ladies thought that she was just doing a bit, then when they realized that she was in some discomfort really got in on the laughter. And we were all laughing with Rosie, not at her.
Lesson Learned: Don't snort Cocaine - or any other carbonated beverage.

Here is Amanda's grade 4 teacher - Mrs. Zupancic. She seems to be a very nice teacher with whom Amanda is very taken. Miss Hopson (gr. 3 teacher) is so last year!!

Amanda is always affronted when I tell her that I don't want her to sleep in my bed with me. She tosses and turns, flings her arms and legs about with abandon. "I'll lay still ... I promise" Here is proof of which I speak. Would you volunteer to sleep with that? That was rhetorical you freak! This picture will not be shown in the family album until she has a ring on her finger - I don't want to go scaring off any promising suitors.

The lengths that I wil go to for my friends. I love Ada so much that I will drink a case of Smirnoff Ice just so that I can give her a 100-minute calling card. And I did it twice. This is the kind of sacrifice that true friends make for each other.

And after 18 years we were due for a new tv. Please welcome this Sharp 37" LCD to the family - we all love him very much. It's a bit more than I had intended on getting/spending, but it's going to be so totally worth it!!! (Yes, I believe that that is Megatron the Original. Kerwyn loves his Saturday morning cartoons.)

Still knitting - still secret! I am going to make some serious in-roads on stuff this weekend.

B-day

Since it's not a big deal 'round these parts I had totally not realized that today was my birthday. Really - it wasn't until I signed Amanda in at school (she waited for me to get home to give her a ride) and had to write the date that I took note of the date. Then my first thought was "Shit - I've got to get some serious knitting done. And pay the water bill. And I'm officially in my late 30's." Yeah, I know I don't look it but most days I feel it.
But I digress - here is an appropriate - and too easy - blogthing. And again, I'm pleasantly surprised at how accurate it is (except for that social cause thing - I just don't have the time to be an activist). Have fun!!

You Are A Hazelnut Tree

You're a charmer with a killer sense of humor. You are very demanding, but you can also be very understanding. No matter what, you always make a lasting impression - you're quite popular. Passionate, you are an active fighter for social causes and politics. In general, you are moody, honest, a perfectionist, and very sexual.

What's Your Celtic Horoscope?

You Are 44% Evil

You are evil, but you haven't yet mastered the dark side. Fear not though - you are on your way to world domination.

How Evil Are You?

Clearly I have got to make a decision - at this rate the Sith wouldn't consider me enough of a threat to even draw a light sabre and the Jedi wouldn't consider me worthy of questioning for consideration for training. I hate being a MugWump. You've never heard that one before. It means that you're sitting on the fence with you Mug on one side and your Wump on the other. Okay - I think that I'm going to work on being less evil, but not less bad. Yeah, I know, but that the way that my mind works. Bwaa-ha-ha. At least I have a bit of an evil laugh!! Thanks to Rabbitch for posting this quiz.

B-day also stands for Blogthing Day - cool how that works out, huh?

Watching AR with Wannietta - part 2

Grab yourself a pulled pork sandwich from the kitchen (yes, I was up very early today to start the Bah-buh-que) complete with vinegar sauce & coleslaw and your beverage of choice and I'll be right with you.
GDI - whad'I miss? Kyle remembered that he needed his hair cut the very second that AR started!!

It's a poor racer who blames his cab driver boys.
Good thing we got Rob on tape admiting his error - I have a feeling that that doesn't happen very often.
How many models does it take to change a tire?
It's a race pretty boys - you really think that other lagging teams are going to lag further to help you? Especially teams that you could probably beat on most challenges? Don't give up your day jobs.
Up to your axels in mud? I concur - you're stuck.
And again, no surprise that everyone takes notice but keep on going.
Rob - stop calling your GF "dude" dude!
Any time that you can choose to rely on your own skills/abilities rather than the cooperation of a beast (and when I say 'beast' I don't mean your partner), do it.
Yeah well, when you walk your horse Kimberley instead of riding it you'll generally fall totally behind.
Nah Peter, that's not quiting; it's just stoping before you're finished. And that's not giving up; it's going back again.
Suck it up Buttercup Rob! It's a Mongolian-beast drawn cart pulled over rocky rural terrain. Unless you'd like to stop and put some shock absorbers on it or pave yourself a nice road, it's just gonna be a bumpy ride.

Commercial break - would you like a slice of peach pie?

Hyundai's - don't get me started.
OMG - they have to crank them up like a freakin' wind-up toy!!!
Nice shot!!!
Sorry to state the obvious Tom, but that was a sad little dribble.
For a guy not saying anything you're saying a whole lot Rob.
C'mon Moms!!!
Cheerleaders having a stoopid day? Say it ain't so!

Yes, watching TV with me is exhausting, but you love it (and the eats) so I know that you'll come back next week for more.

To Censor or Not

Indeed, that it the question of the day.

My mother is a devout Christian and raised us thusly. I fall quite a bit short of the devout mark and that hasn't been too hard to camouflage since my mother has been living totally off-line. Play ominous music - like when bad news is going to be delivered.

She has taken a leap of faith and joined the rest of us in the 21st century and is now online. I'm not quite sure how web-savvy she is, but I'm sure that my blog will not remain a secret. Dont get me wrong - I'm proud of everything that I do that becomes blog-worthy and I'm not ashamed of how I choose to express myself. Yet when I consider that my mother may read it gives me pause. I don't swear like a sailor or regale the masses with the details of my sexual escapades. Okay - the odd blue word slips in & adds some extra colour to my fairly plain life. I don't apologize for it; what you read on my blog is really who I am.
When I'm with my mother I have enough respect to literally bite my tongue, but should I be obligated to do that here? I feel that I should feel like I should, but truth be told I'm just not feelin' it.

Perhaps I could put a * in the title when swears were the most appropriate expression that I could come up with. Then she wouldn't have to read it. Except then she might feel extra special compelled to read what I wrote - like that sadistic curiosity about accidents scenes.
Maybe she'll love it won't say anything I'll just not think about it until she brings it up. And believe me, if she has an objection I'll know about it. Yeah, that's it - head in the sand, oblivious.

And do I really think that I could self-censor? I could too!! It just wouldn't last long and would probably induce a stroke. Definitely not worth the risk. Take me as I am or leave me alone & I'll get back to my knitting.

Ada - I watched Grey's Anatomy tonight. I not as enamoured of it as you are but I'll give it a real chance - maybe it'll grow on me.
The Last Knit. This is a really funny video - I actually laughed out loud! I felt the depths of her passion, determination, desperation & complusion. There was one bit that gave me a bit of a panic attack, but fortunately I had some knitting in my hands to calm me. Thanks for the heads up Michelle!

Amanda's Yesterday

The knitting goes on and there is really nothing new or noteworthy to share so I will blog Amanda's yesterday.

Perhaps with all of the excitement about Talk Like a Pirate Day y'all missed the World Volleyball Tryouts. Tuesday was the 1st part, there is another session Thursday. Fortunately I was there and I bring you a couple of the best moments. No, I didn't get any knitting done for the half hour that I was there. Trust me, taking the pictures was dangerous enough. Volleyballs in the hands of 9-11 year olds could be construed as weapons. Look at the concentration on Amanda's face! "I'm not going to miss. I'm not going to miss. I'm not going to miss!" Taking into consideration that most children don't spend a lot of time at home practicing volleyball Amanda did really well. I managed to capture her one perfect serve - the other 2 went astray.

She didn't seem quite herself, but I chalked it up to just trying really hard to make a good first impression on the coaches. By the time we got into the van she has little tears running down her face. I thought that she was disappointed because there are only going to be 12 girls chosen for the team. Sandy (her friend Riley's mom) & I had told the girls that most likely the older girls would be selected, try your best, next year/different team - you know the routine. It wasn't that. She had a headache and her stomach hurt. I gave her some Tylenol when we got home then went downstairs to talk with Kyle. By the time that I got back upstairs the li'l darlin' was already in her bed falling asleep. She woke up when I tucked her in and started getting upset because she had a short story to write (spelling word exercise). I swear I don't know which is more trying - the child who lies and tries to get out of any & all homework or the child who demonstrates a serious dedication to homework completion. I reassured her that we would work it out, so she laid back down and slept for a few hours. (Dr. Cheeky Monkey has a great bed-side manner) When she woke she had some soup then knocked off a rough story draft ("I can't sleep - my head feels a bit better.") that needs some editing and re-writing. I could see that she was really trying to push through the headache so I insisted that she go back to bed & I wrote a note for Ms. Zupancic (Zoo-pan'-zick), who seems very nice & I'm sure will understand.
Amanda feels much better this morning. I told her that we're going to keep track of these headaches and try to see if there's a pattern. For her to feel so sick from them I have a small suspicion that they may be migraines. I hope it's not her medication (for ADHD), but if it is we'll just try something new. Even on the meds she eats a decent lunch, so it's not a hunger-headache.

Today I picked up some nice large (9lb) pork butt roasts from a local meat shop - Country Meat Cuts. These are going in the smoker on Saturday. Smoke ... mmmmm. It was amazing! Freezers full of boxed meat, fresh meat and a mind-boggling array of homemade frozen food. I swear that I will never go to M&M again! I bought some stewing beef for (big surprise - drum roll please ...) beef stew, some sausages to try, some individual hot lunches for Kerwyn when he doesn't have sandwiches and I couldn't resist a peach pie. Peaches .... mmmmmmm. Cheeky Monkey had his face up in it as soon as I set the box down.

I may have mentioned it before but I really love watching tv. It has kind of a symbiotic relationship with my knitting so I don't apologize for it. Anyway, with all of the returning shows & the new shows I'm having to really plan my evenings. I have Bell ExpressVu with a PVR (Personal Video Recorder - like Tivo) but our 15+ year old tv doesn't have the right connections to hook it up. As it is Kerwyn had to set up a converter so that we could have the satellite & DVD both hooked up & not have to actually undo & redo wires everytime we wanted to switch between them. So until we get a new tv I thank God for satellite & time shifting. Tonight it's ANTM, Jericho, Criminal Minds & CSI NY. Talk about an intense night!
I started reading Darkly Dreaming Dexter in preparation for the new series (aptly named) Dexter. This show looks seriously intriguing, not in small part due to the talents of Michael C. Hall.

Watching AR with Wannietta - part 1

I have waited so long for this ... it better live up to my built-up expectations!
Drinkie - check

Snacks - check
Knitting - check

I agree - if Kerwyn could build me another set of arms to knit with I would be totally attracted to him!
Yeah Kimberly - you gotta learn that! (those 2 are gonna get a lot of camera time; I can just tell)
I don't know as how I would describe AR as "quality time", but whatever.
Please don't put "ability to have a conversation with a doorknob" as an attractive quality - it kinda makes us think that you're cheerleaders.
It's an automatic Benz ... these two are gonna be funny - if they last. OMG - they're not the only ones!!
The coalminers wife thinks that the beauty queens are beautiful ... go figure.
"Thrifty's a rental car place ... how'm I supposed to know that?" you gotta learn these things Kim.
If Muslims believe in Buddha, then who do Buddists believe in?
It's AR Alabama - you take any advantages that you can. Have you not watched the show before?
No fucking way!! This is why I would never, ever be on this or Survivor or any bloody show with shit for food. Slimey is slimey whether you chew it or not.
You go girls!!!
So you're hungry are you?
Coalminers wife can't be shaken - you rock!
"You don't know the Golden House?" wtf - you really think that one restaurant is going to help you to eat at another? Maybe in the happyl ittle Land of Beauty Queens (and maybe Canada - we're stupid nice like that) but not in China.
I wonder if Kellie & Jamies' hands are callused from clapping so much?
That's a shame - must've been the will of God. Do you think that the AR, progress of the teams (or lack thereof) or who wins is even on His radar? Okay, if you think so.
Like any of y'all had time to get to know - what were their names?
Not quite so sexy when he's not quite so useful, huh?
I think that I'd have to go with the labour & let Kerwyn pick up my slack. I'm way too white to be that coordinated and too uptight to be that relaxed. Kerwyn's an engineer and is very methodical. He'd have that brick thing aced.
I agree. Sitting in traffic in a foreign country with no clue where to go is bad. No two ways around it.
The Beauty Queens think that the male models are attractive - go figure.
Maybe you wouldn't have to "take tones" with each other if you'd listen to Kim a bit dude. You may be a man but you are not The Man.
The Chinese people do not seem to be amused by the American Slapstick take on Tai Chi.
Yeah, maybe you should (use the loops) actually. Show off!
Hell, I'm crying for Sarah.
I'm developing a liking for the Coalminers wife - she tells that man and he knows not to smart her back!
Yeah Tom & Jerrry!!! It wasn't pretty but it was done.
Good Karma - well it worked for the Hippies. It's worth a shot.
I shouldn't laugh because I'm quite certain that I would suck to the -enth power at wall climbing, but it's funny!!
Moms rock!
Wives rock!
Was Vipul's 'Colege" t-shirt supposed to be a joke?

We are not disappointed! I am exhausted though - at least I'll have a week to recover.

De Beads Boss, De Beads!

Butterfly calls for beads so it was with a giddy kind of pleasure that I got out my mini bead spinner and spun some beads.

Beads in the Spinner

Beads caught on the Hook

Beads on the Yarn

I can't even begin to tell you what a great little tool this is! If you have to string beads for knitting with you need a spinner. They come in larger sizes for larger beads and/or greater amounts of beads. I purchased mine from The Beadspinner Lady and am very happy. Once you get one you will look for patterns that call for beads just so that you can use it. OMG Daunte!! Which team are you playing for? How did you think that your receiver was going to catch that through 2!!! Bills?!? ffs So, here is my Butterfly swatch. The beads don't show up very well so I will have to think about if I'm going to try a different colour (I can get some at the CSNF) or whether I'll just leave them out altogether. I know, it's so much fun to spin them but if they don't make a significant impact ... that and the challenge that placing them randomly throughout seems to be posing for me. I'm really not very good at being deliberately random. I'm very good at accidental haphazardness and forgetful flukiness is a specialty, but planning random? Uh, nope.

I also don't know how I managed to succesfully complete Flirty Ruffles in 16 days and later do a Tina Shawl. The most basic lace patterns seem to kick my ass - and I don't mean with a soft, fluffy pillow either. We're talking steel-toed, size 16 boot kickin'. The Lacy Scallop socks are littered with next-row corrections and it took me the entire Butterfly swatch to get this 8 row pattern down pat. And it's not even really 8 rows - it's a 4 row pattern off-set. To make matters even trickier, I managed to knit fluff and not notice till the swatch was done. I know, better late than never, but still ...

Sharable Progress

The scarf set is 'un fait accompli'! In small part because I know that Elann is going to take a great picture and in greater part because I forgot there isn't a picture of it today.
I can, however, show you the entire back of the Naturally Easy Raglan II. In focus & everything. I know - isn't it great! The yarn - Naturally Me - is buttery soft and is spoiling me rotten.

I can also share a little of the new sweater that I'm working on for Elise. The yarn is Elsebeth Lavold's Silky Wool. This yarn is also so luscious that I made it the focus of the photo - you can kind of see the sweater in the background.

Today is going to be a great knitting day! Kyle is at a friend's house and Kerwyn is taking Amanda to the Georgian College Car Show. For a small event Kerwyn has been very impressed with what the students put together - living so close now is a nice bonus. I can knit as much as I want to, make what I want to eat and not have to share (that may seem a bit selfish, but there it is), and have a nice relaxing drinkie while I watch what I want to on tv or dvd without interruption. Oh yeah, this is going to be a great day! I hope that it is for you too.

An Interview with Amanda

So Amanda, what do you think about all of the comments about your work?
It's cool, I guess. I didn't think so many people would really care.

What's your favourite colour?
Pink. (As she rolls her eyes. She's slow getting into the spirit of this interview thing)

Who do you want to win Big Brother?
Erika

Who do you wish could have won?
Chicken George

Is your room as neat as Julie's shelves?
Noooooo! (I'll take a picture and then you other mothers won't be jealous)

What was the best part of your day working at The Store?
When my mom let me help on the cash register. She told me what buttons to push - I didn't make any mistakes.

Do you know how to knit? Are you knitting anything right now?
Yes. No.

What is your favourite thing that you mom ever knit for you?
The pink pom pom hat. The one that Cheeky Monkey ate the pom pom's off of. Can you make me another one this year?
Get in line kid Of course, love.
Are we done yet?

She's shy around new people. No worries though, once she gets to know you she'll be telling you enough to write epics and their sequels with.
Seriously - thanks for all of the positive & encouraging comments. Amanda loves having her pictures on the blog & gets a kick out of the comments.

This is Ted. He is my Personal Nerd from Nerds On Site. The desktop has been slowing down exponentially over the last year. I literally walk away and knit a few rows or make a pot of coffee or take a potty break while the POS expensive paperweight boots up. Then there's the scanner problem where I have to unplug it before the computer reboots or else I get an error message - a big one that can't just be clicked away. Then when I set up the wireless router for Etienne I managed to screw up the internet connection to the destop. Since Etienne & I are up & surfing I wasn't too worried about it; the children on the other hand have made it quite clear (on a daily basis) how they feel about being unplugged.
But Ted fixed it all! And when he said that he could/would network Etienne with Andrew so that Etienne could print for me without have to save to a data key - I swear that it required all of my willpower not to throw my arms around Ted and kiss him! I even said "Ted, if you do that for me I will have to stop myself from kissing you!" Fortunately he was only slightly freaked out and covered it up smoothly with a chuckle.
Ted was prompt, professional and knowledgeable. He did his thing without being intrusive or invisible. He was friendly without being familiar. I am really impressed.

The Children are super impressed! They came running out to meet me after school. "It's so cool!! It's really fast now! Did you do that?!" I think that the emphasis on the last question implied incredulity rather than awe. They know me too well.

Amanda @ Julie's

Amanda really wanted to try her hand at working with me at Julie's. Kyle had been coming with me for the last few years (I've actually forgotten how long it's een) but recently has felt like it's too long of a boring drive each way ('bout 2.5 -3 hours). So Amanda convinced me that she was good for it. And she was. She neatened shelves and tidied up some of the Anchor tapestry wool downstairs.
She has a whole different style than Kyle does. He prefers to do one or two cubby holes at a time & if he finds yarn further down for a shelf that he's already done, he'll move the neat front yarn and put the new ball in the back. Amanda wipes out the entire section that she's organizing. (and when I say 'wipe out' I mean it) She then begins sorting out what will go where, finds all of the appropriate balls that belong there and then puts everything where it belongs. Here is one of her completed shelves. She also demonstrated a keen eye for subtle colour variations. A couple of times she asked, "Are these the same colour?" It turned out that the yarns had different dyelots. She now knows about the colour & lot #'s on the ball bands.
Without bias, I have to say that she worked more consistently and tirelessly than Kyle did on his first day. We stayed a bit late to finish a section that I had started in the store room (I just couldn't leave it in a half-finished state. It would have been worse than not having started it in the first place). I had to alnost drag her out of the store. I swear, she would have stayed the night if I had encouraged her even a little. Julie - Amanda would like to know when we can come back. And it isn't just the about the money for her - she really enjoyed herself! I've missed working at The Store too - it was nice to be back, even if it was just for the day.

Okay, maybe it's because I aced it but this was a fun test/game. Give it a go & let us know how you did!

English Genius You scored 92% Beginner, 100% Intermediate, 100% Advanced, and 100% Expert!

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 0% on Beginner You scored higher than 99% on Intermediate You scored higher than 99% on Advanced You scored higher than 99% on Expert

You did so extremely well, even I can't find a word to describe your excellence! You have the uncommon intelligence necessary to understand things that most people don't. You have an extensive vocabulary, and you're not afraid to use it properly! Way to go! Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it!

Link: The Commonly Confused Words Test written by shortredhead78 on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Edited to add: I apologize for not knowing how to tweak the code for this test so that it doesn't spill into the sidebar. I tried but have lost this battle. That and some really sick (and I don't mean that in a cool way) grammar. A Hard Mike's is good to find but hard on my skils (sic).

Next Hurdle Please

Fastest Knitter - I've won it once so I am totally cool if it was a once in a lifetime event. I mean, I really hope that it won't be and I will always give all comers a run for their money, but I've met that goal so I can go back to being the bridesmaid.


Published Designer - I dabble in design when inspiration strikes and while Crystal is available as a free pattern, it was first published by KnitNet back in 2001.


Pusblished Author - I love talking. When I talk it's fast - I just have so many thoughts and if I don't get them out in time I forget them. Writing should solve this, right? I mean, if I could get the words on paper (or screen) then they'd be immortalized and could still be forgotten but still be retrievable. The problem is is that I can't type nearly fast enough!!! Curse me for not taking typing in high school.
So now when I really want to write - as opposed to just jot down some thoughts or record events - I make all sorts of jots on whatever is handy. Knitting patterns work great because I will never accidentally toss them and it's highly unlikely that I would allow them to become illegible crumpled or soggenly blurred. Then I save the draft, and over hours or days (depending on how quickly I need/want to get the thing out) there are additions, cuts and edits involving dictionaries and thesauruses to find the exact word to say what I mean. I know that there are a few of you out there thinking, "Can we get Wannietta to write everything?" I love you for only thinking that and I know that you love me just the way I am or you'd stop calling me, making eye contact in public (yes, eye contact is just an unpsoken question and the perfect conversation starter) and asking me out!
I mentioned awhile ago that I had written an article about the Back to Back Wool Challenge for Spinners' Quarterly and encouraged you all to take out a subscription. Not just for my article ... really!! I know that most of you aren't spinners so this was impractical. Lorraine must have sensed this as well and to keep an all-out spinner/knitter war from starting, she has posted my article on the SQ site. When I read it I actually went back to my drafts because there were some things that I didn't even remember writing! Lorraine is an awesome editor and makes me look like not an illiterate with spell-check!

So, next hurdle - I dunno!!! You can bet that I will take you all on the journey - unless it gets messed up and makes me look bad, then it will be vaulted.

Here is the Lacy Riverine scarf blocking. That's the headband on the upper left. There just remains a pair of mitt/muffatees. They're like long shaped cuffs that you can wear as fingerless mitts or long cuffs.